Stressed? me? says Who!

In Pilates today (well, sort of today...it was today when i wrote the post...) we started with a warm-up, did some awesome exercises to strengthen our arms with resistance rings and then, just when I was getting pumped up for a great work-out, she turned off the lights and said, "Now we're going to learn the importance of relaxation."

What?

So we all laid down, closed our eyes, put our arms out, and started breathing. She walked us through the inhalations and exhalations and clearing your brain.

But I finally got my brain to hold all the information it needs to hold! I've finally got the to-do list in order, just the way I want it! Now is not the time to CLEAR it!!

She said to be aware of your pulse, your heartbeat. Feel the tingle in your fingertips? That's your pulse; that's the circulation.

Really? I've always associated that feeling with my hand falling asleep from lack of circulation.

Let the air wash over you and cleanse your body.

The tingling has spread to my hands. My fingers are starting to curl. The last time this happened I was donating blood and almost passed out. ...should I be worried?

Now imagine you're walking through a forest, a dense forest....

I can't focus on your little forest right now, I'm preoccupied with trying to get blood back into my fingers!

(at this point I started fidgeting with my hands, trying to improve the circulation, which was completely defeating the purpose of the 'relaxation/meditation' exercise)

As you walk through the forest you see a stream...so clear and pure and clean....

I can't focus on this. I want to get up and move my arms around so I can get life back into my fingertips.

Feel the strength and solidarity of Nature all around you....

Nature? Really? That's where we're goin' with this? If you really wanted me to relax you'd start describing my bed.

(From there my mind wandered to sleeping in,  warm sunlight coming in through my window, bringing out my sketchbook to doodle, drawing for Tawni so I can get the homework assignment done, but before that I should go back to the computer lab to finish projects for Jim, did I do the reading for Anthropology? I don't think I did the reading for Anthropology...holy crap, is she still talking about that stream? I've got stuff to do, I don't have time to lie here in the dark all day!)

So much for "relaxing" right?