limerick Junkie

I have a fantastic group of friends and every so often we have a Poetry Slam. They used to be Mad Hatter Poetry Slams, but then we became aware of the magic that is Steampunk (because it's fantastic) and now these events have become Steampunk Poetry Slams (and they're fantastic).
The program consists mainly of poetry, original compositions or personal favorites, ranging from humorous to solemn to bizarre. There are also other performances including music and multi-media presentations. Basically it's a night to share in creativity with friends, and it is always delightful.

Last night was no exception.

I wrote a small handful of humorous limericks about being pregnant (limericks have been my favorite since I learned about them in some obscure children's book when I was 7 years old. the spelling was different in that book and I've spent most of my life, on into my adult years, convinced that the spelling is "lymric" and not "limerick". I will spell it "limerick" because every dictionary I can lay my hands on and every internet search engine has told me this is so...but part of me is still convinced that it should be "lymric," which I find to be a much more aesthetically pleasing way to spell it. So there.)

Aaaanyway. The limericks (*coughlymricscough*), posted here for your enjoyment.

One Way Trip

(A Collection of Pregnancy Limericks)

A child we would like to rear;

The time when we'll have one draws near.

The idea seemed charming,

But it's somewhat alarming,

'Cuz there's no turning back now, I fear.

I'm excited for when I will show.

Gaining weight's scary, but I know,

In this case, it's not bad;

But I'm still a bit sad,

That I'm slim and curvy no mo'.

My husband says that I look great,

He can't tell that I've gained any weight.

But I know in my mind,

That in 9 month's time,

I'm going to be HUGE at this rate.

My appetite's out of control,

I'm so HUNGRY I feel like a troll.

Every two hours,

The kitchen I scour,

And after 2 bites, I am full.

My least favorite pregnancy curse,

Is the nausea, it is the worst.

All night and all day,

Never goes away,

With or without food, it still hurts.

I'm so sleepy all through the day,

So I nap and I lounge and I pray

That somehow I might,

Sleep through the night;

Until then, nocturnal I'll stay.

I'm sleepy most all of the time;

Constant exhaustion is unkind.

As a matter of fact,

I've not had my nap,

I'm amazed this poem even rhymes.

Someone suggested I write more of them and turn them into a book. "What to Expect When You're Expecting - In Rhyme!" I'm pretty tempted, not gonna lie. Sounds like a book I would read. And thoroughly enjoy. And recommend to friends.

(thoughtful pause)

Challenge accepted.

Disclaimer: humorous writings on the predicament of pregnancy does not qualify this as a "mommy blog" so point that finger somewhere else!